My grandmother, Catherine Gill, died 93 years ago this week—one week after giving birth to my dad. She was 23. My grandparents couldn’t afford a doctor, so she gave birth to my dad in their home on the east side of Detroit. The midwife didn’t clean the placenta correctly, causing her to die from sepsis. Only recently did I learn that the midwife was in fact my grandma’s own mom.

My dad never talked about his childhood. After my dad passed away, my uncle explained to me that my grandfather always held his wife’s death against my dad, so my dad grew up neglected in a very poor home in the midst of the Great Depression.

My dad’s story reminds me of many of the stories I hear in the communities in which we work. 

Visiting with our scholars and team members in Guatemala.

I’m in Guatemala as I write this, and as I listen to the stories of our team members and scholars from the community here, I can’t help but think of my own dad as they describe how difficult their lives have been because of the tragic death of a parent or the trauma they have suffered because of the absence, abuse, or addictions of a father or step-father in their home.

I know deep in my heart that our scholars can give their children a better life because that is what my dad did for my siblings and me. He loved us, selflessly, and sought to give us the childhood he never had. We went to bed every night and woke up every day with the peace and safety that comes with a loving father and mother in our home. 

Our scholars now have the opportunity to do the same, for the families they will lead. You have given them an amazing opportunity to break out of poverty by giving them a chance to get a good education—and our scholars are making the most out of those opportunities. 

Samaritan Scholars in Guatemala

But research and common sense are clear: the least expensive, fastest, and most rewarding way to move from poverty into the middle class is to get and stay married. Marriage is something wealthy people are continuing to do at consistently high rates, but fewer and fewer people in low-income communities are doing, both here in the United States and in the communities we serve. 

This trend can be changed. On the advice of a good friend, our team leaders and I watched The Dating Project and have begun exploring more intentional ways to help our scholars learn how to build and maintain healthy relationships.

Marriage and home lives are such intensely personal experiences. It can be difficult to talk openly about them because we all come to the subject with our own hopes, hurts, and experiences. But not talking about how to have healthy relationships will only encourage current trends to continue. We intend to change that, and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Please reply to this email to reach me directly with your questions or suggestions!

Three years ago, Selam Terefe, our East Africa Regional Director, encouraged my wife and me to write a book about marriage and parenting after we spent a week with her team and scholars in Ethiopia. It took a while, but we’ve been chipping away at the book ever since. We were finally able to publish it this week, complete with a foreword from Selam!

Our prayer is that this book will inspire and equip young people to enjoy the fruits of a faith-filled life and loving marriage. I would love to hear what you think and would be particularly grateful if you could share a review on Amazon to help spread the word.

Mike Tenbusch, President

Mike joined International Samaritan in 2018 after two decades of leading social change in his hometown of Detroit, Michigan. He’s a University of Michigan Law grad and author of The Jonathan Effect: Helping Kids and Schools Win the Battle Against Poverty. He and his wife, Maritza, have three children who keep them young.